So the universe seems to be against my blogging.

So yesterday I learned that when falling off a horse one must always try to avoid falling on their shoulder.

Cause you break your collarbone.

And that is the end of that. 

This means that posting is going to be a bit infrequent because I can type with only one hand and that is incredibly infuriating.

Yesterday I also learned about people and bonding. It's funny because the thing about getting to know people is that you are rarely conscious of it.  Because maybe you are the kind of person who is always seen in the background of the cast photos, always reading a book but always listening. It sometimes takes months for you to realize that you have somehow gotten to know these people. A quick chat backstage, a friendly greeting sometime during the week. You all are sharing a common experience,giving birth to something bigger than yourselves.
I learned that it's easy to ignore this. That it's easy to decide that you are a separate piece because that frees you from the responsibility.
I'm not saying that through these experiences you are making these people your new best friends but I am saying that we all need to take a moment and see how much we have changed. See what we have let into our lives.
And be grateful.
And care.

The North American Dream Sweeping Team.

Today I learned about humility. When you are a white middle class teenage girl (or anyone really though the white middle class is especially good at this) it's easy to see yourself as a "saviour" (a great example of this is How Not to Write About Africa). I have to say I was like that when I learned I would be participating in a habitat for humanity project. It's easy to get a swollen head when people are telling you how great it is that you are doing this, the gift that you are giving someone.
Yes I am giving the gift of my time, I am making a small small contribution. 
I had to be reminded of that. We all have to be reminded of that.
How?
Well sweeping for about eight solid hours will do that for you.
I did briefly use some power tools and I put up some drywall but basically it was solid sweeping. Picking up discarded pieces of wood and insulation. Cleaning, cleaning and more cleaning.
I must admit I complained. I bitched. But I got the job done. By the end of the day I was tired and covered in a thin layer of dust.
I was at a loss for what I had learned. What I had contributed.
It was only when I saw on my facebook page that another student was talking about how happy he was that he didn't go. That it was ridiculous to spend $50 dollars on a broom (all participants must raise $50 in pledges.)
That's when I saw the I's. That's when I realized that this day wasn't about being a saviour and it wasn't a waste of time.
Volunteering is simply about time. It's about effort and contributing no matter what the cost. It's about solitude sometimes and bonding with people others. It's about doing what is needed not what looks pretty. It's about giving everything you have whether it's your talents or simply some physical labour.
In a way it's about giving up and giving of yourself. 
So I guess the only thing I'm left wondering is
What are we going to do next?

Lessons From My Sister

This blog is kind of preachy I know. I hope that if I make enough points that a few of them will be valid and that maybe I/You/My sister will learn something. But it's the #1 sister's (Not that she is my favorite but she was the first sister) birthday and as much as I like to think I am so smart and self sufficient. She's taught me some stuff.

1. She has taught me that there is a whole other side to every story. I have been in the same social place my whole life. I have been a proud outsider. She has not. When I am screaming about indignation she can calmly explain that missing piece to the whole thing. She has taught me about balance.

2. She has taught me about strength. My sister has watched me fall apart more times then I can count. She has been funny and sarcastic and strong and smart. She has made boundaries and protected herself while caring for others. She has taught me about protecting and caring.

There are so many things she has taught me. I think about the things I consider myself to be and one of the most important one is being a sister. So there is a lesson in this; We often disagree with the people we care for we have moments where we want to slam their heads into walls. But we need to remember that these are the people who make us who we are. When we see this we really begin to appreciate and grow with these people. We need to do this because as I've been reminded recently we don't have people with us for a long time and in times of pain often the only comfort we can find is that we loved these people with such ferocity that we know that they'll never really be gone.