What your cheering for the 15 year old mediocre singer? Scream for the 81 year old man!!

Yesterday I had the chance to go this concert/conference called me to we. Or they called it "We Day" but like the rogers centre(For you non Canadians it's a sports stadium in Toronto that was formerly called the sky dome and I will always call it that). Anyways... it was run by free the children which is a pretty cool organization. I wasn't a huge fan of Justin Beiber or surprise guests the Jonas Brothers but ELI WEISEL WAS THERE
He wrote this book called Night which I consider on of the most influential books I have ever read. I hope to find a picture of me having my fan girl explosion later but I have been too lazy to upload pictures.

So...I guess I need to get to my point.

The day was empowering it was eclectic and electric. It makes you want to do more. I guess that is my point. That you can see everything that is terrible in the world and you can sit and cry (which sometimes you do need to do) or you can sit down and say HOW CAN I CHANGE THIS? Sometimes we like to throw money at a cause and hope that it will go away but really we need to get out there and do something. This day made me not only question myself as an activist but it made me question myself as a person. How often do we see the big issue get scared and do something small?

Big issues call for big solutions sometimes.

I have more stories to tell but I am trying to keep one story to one post so there will probably be multiple posts today.

My dream was realised but I was sleeping

This week I learned that sometimes you have bad weeks.

Really bad weeks and sometimes those weeks are so bad that you decided to throw away your life ambition and become a asexual hermit whose has cats and maybe a coffee machine.

I really haven't given this week much thought in terms of lessons for my sister but due to my nonexistent readership I thought I would try and make something out of this week so I feel better when I check my statcounter page.
This week I learned that people lie

a lot. People lie so much that your never going to catch all of it and every once is a while you are going to be so fooled that your left feeling like a four year old.

I now accept this I've got a (hopefully) long life ahead of me and I'm going to be left feeling hopelessly stupid many more times. This brings me to number two on the list of things I learned this week.

IT IS OKAY TO CRY

Many people would wonder why I would bold and CAPS LOCK this it seems so obvious but sometimes the things are hidden in plain sight.

Emotions suck at times because feeling hurt...hurts feeling mad can feel ugly and out of control and feeling happy can just feel so lame in an overly cynical world.

At the end of the day though sometimes you need to put on the fluffy sweater turn on the TV grab your overly large dog and do some serious big baby style sobbing. Then you can ingest the chemical weight of a small factory in strawberry marshmallows.

Things seem better. Then you have crazy dreams about elevators and stuff.

But it's a fair tradeoff.

Finally I learned that were always going to make mistakes with our friends. Sometimes they are going to be really really really big mistakes and we just have to wait it out. Because you can't make anyone forgive you. Sometimes you really mess up and your going to have to wait for that person to comes to terms with it.

I didn't think that the first nine days of school would be this hard/educational/amazing

In the meantime I'll watch Glee while pretending to be Rachel Berry and manufacturing a lovechild wardrobe of Emma Pillsbury and Kurt Hummel. TV addictions are a sad thing never fall into them.

Dreaming of the time when you are free from all the trouble you're in

Sorry for not updating in what feels like so long! So I combined one draft and one new lesson into a borderline sermon on discovery in the summertime.

Today I learned about "accomplishments" and how often we forget what they really are.

Summer "time" kicked in and I was shocked to find out that today was a Wednesday. That kind of scares me I don't want summer to slip by ala Arthur's "The Short Quick Summer"

But despite my qualms I am learning the joys of laziness. I've found a way to kill my internal clock and now can easily wake up at 10:00. This is important. So much of the time it feels like we are all under the gun. I'm all for one living life to the fullest like every day was my last etc etc.

I'm figuring out that summer doesn't have to be defined by how many people I hang out with or parties or events or anything like that. I can be a total recluse for days and then just go play tennis at the local courts and buy Dora the explorer Popsicles. That writing summer to do lists can be motivating and fun but often all a day needs is a new playlist,a good library book and shade in your favorite hammock. And that wraps up early summer lesson one.

Today I learned about friendships...and irony.

Today taught me that sometimes even when we are so convinced that were going to have one friend forever. Perhaps even remarking on this the morning before you see the other person,but maybe while sitting by the lake you realize.

"I'm outgrowing you"

And you don't want this,nobody wants it. But I think you really truly actually grow up the day you say "I don't care about growing up". I've never been one to judge and whatever illegal activities my teenage friends will involve themselves in I'm okay with that. But it's this absolute race to finish line of adulthood that scares me.

My friends call me a 40 year old. I like "strange music" Which by the way check out check Ohbijou and Regina Spektor they both have newish albums out and they are amazing!

But I think my most defining 40 year old quality is the fact that I am content where I am. I'm not searching for anything better I just want to try and learn as much as I can prepare yet live in the moment and live a great life full of contradictions and confusion and new experiences.

So I grow up, I grow down but in the end we all outgrow. The nice thing about the past though is that we never have to kill the memories. I will laugh at my grade 7 "I'm so dark and twisted lets wear lots of eyeliner and take it off before I go home"stage. I'll cry at the sad memories we shared I'll laugh at our moments of silliness. But in the end things aren't the same. I'm not the same and she is. We'll move on in our lives and we can thank each other for helping each other make it this far.

Summer makes me reflective it makes me melancholy at times but I am always learning.

Today I didn't learn much. I learned never to trust ANYONE who tells you where your exam is not the commissionaire or your classmates NOBODY just go into the halls and check the postings saves you a lot of strife. I also learned that writing lists is a great way to make yourself feel like you've accomplished something. Cause if by the end of the year you can say that you accomplished one thing on your list things are good.

Therefore....

THIS SUMMER

1. Attend/Help organize a rally because Mc Carthy's big uniform supplier uses child labour? Not cool.

2.Learn To Sew- I need to stop going into stores and saying "Oh god I could make that!" it bothers salespeople

3.Learn to Cook-I sound so domestic!

4.Practice my flute (My guriella war tactics won out evil music teacher retired! )

5. Get a good grasp on the guitar

6. Have amazing bonfire making starlight party at petro park

7.Visit the art gallery in the city and locally regularly.

8. Use the car as little as possible

9.Teach everyone the beauty of Kerr street. Seriously it's a haven just waiting to be discovered.

10.Return my library books on time.

11. Keep being a "Harold" ala Harold and Maude and visiting the cemeteries with Meagan. (One Day write a post explaining this)

12. WriteWriteWrite

13.Walk through the lakeside trails downtown till we reach a secluded park blasting the Beatles. Then have a picnic.

14.Eat lots of Gelato

15. Have "Film fests"

16. Get mum's old SLR and take lots and lots of pictures.

17. Be Brave

18.Take Chances

19.Forget everything I learned in school except for drama and history those are important things

20. See 500 days of Summer and get my hair cut like the girl in 500 days of summer

21.Make those tshirts for all my friends "Modest as an Effin Peacock" "Plain as an Effin Zebra" "Happy as an Effin Thundercloud" "Straight as an Effin Curly Straw" etc. etc.

22. Go to lots and lots of varied concerts

24. Have more choir kid reunion specials and interesting artsy kid hangouts which result in interesting and blurry pictures that make me look like a ghost.