Dress Rehearsals

Ever since the smash hit Glee hit the airwaves the world has fallen in love with choir, and show tunes. I of course being the perpetual geek loved this stuff anyways , I'm the band geek, the choir nerd. Glee has provided me with the moments that I dream of. You know the one's where you are singing and suddenly the stage lights come up and it's just you on that stage and it could be just you on this planet and you don't care because this is your moment.
Well I never thought I would get one of those but I did.
It happened accidentally. We were practicing in the gym and they were setting up stage lights for tomorrow's concert and it just happened that the gym lights were turned off and the lovely glowy stage lights came up just as my solo started.
It was here that the lesson hit me. 
First of all I had never wanted anything more badly in my life than this solo (it's the female one). So I worked and I got it. So I guess that's a lesson but I'm sure you read the little engine that could at least once during your childhood.
What I really learned today is that we need to learn to lose ourselves.
There will be things that we can never do alone but that we have to. Things like solo's or making tough decisions about your own future. 
So we have to tell ourselves to take a back seat. We have to get rid of everything inside of us that is scared or worried or unsure.
It's funny because when we lose ourselves if only for a few minutes (or bars of music) we arrive back into our bodies slightly different. It's a tiny change but it's for the best and it pushes us towards the day that we won't have to lose ourselves anymore.

I channeled Mercedes Jones by the way. Give me her over Rachel Berry any day. 

Get ready for me love, 'cause I'm a "comer" I simply gotta march, my heart's a drummer

So that last post was very short but it makes me feel like a more dedicated blogger and I also think that a lesson like that deserves to be short and in it's own category. So the formal was a few nights ago and I can't say I learned much from it. I learned that the cheapest limo company that you got at the last second might possibly have mob connections. Either that or you had nothing to do in the cheap and cold limo ride. I also proved that classy and comfortable always beat out skanky and uncomfortable. But I think the most important thing I learned was that sometimes going out on a limb and not being sure of something's outcome and even though you have low expectation you end up having (at least a little) fun.

I also realized that you could be in a box car or something in the middle of winter with not much else and as long as you had great people with you then it won't be so bad.

It may sound cheesy but it's at times like this that I realize how lucky I am to know the people that I do. Continuing on this cheese fest I need to say that it's at times like this that we need to take a step back and examine our social lives. Not with the critical eye that we (or at least I) usually do but to try and see the light in everyone or at least something that makes you re-remember why you even talk to this person. Like I've said a million times (and especially since starting grade eleven/the holidays) life is stressful but it's better when you around people who love you and even better when you take time to recognize this.
So call your friends rent a good movie (May I suggest Funny Girl?) or at least listen to this and that. Smile , wait for Christmas (or enjoy currently celebrating Hanukkah) and surround yourself with people who love you and don't forget to tell (or at least remember) why you do.

My dream was realised but I was sleeping

This week I learned that sometimes you have bad weeks.

Really bad weeks and sometimes those weeks are so bad that you decided to throw away your life ambition and become a asexual hermit whose has cats and maybe a coffee machine.

I really haven't given this week much thought in terms of lessons for my sister but due to my nonexistent readership I thought I would try and make something out of this week so I feel better when I check my statcounter page.
This week I learned that people lie

a lot. People lie so much that your never going to catch all of it and every once is a while you are going to be so fooled that your left feeling like a four year old.

I now accept this I've got a (hopefully) long life ahead of me and I'm going to be left feeling hopelessly stupid many more times. This brings me to number two on the list of things I learned this week.

IT IS OKAY TO CRY

Many people would wonder why I would bold and CAPS LOCK this it seems so obvious but sometimes the things are hidden in plain sight.

Emotions suck at times because feeling hurt...hurts feeling mad can feel ugly and out of control and feeling happy can just feel so lame in an overly cynical world.

At the end of the day though sometimes you need to put on the fluffy sweater turn on the TV grab your overly large dog and do some serious big baby style sobbing. Then you can ingest the chemical weight of a small factory in strawberry marshmallows.

Things seem better. Then you have crazy dreams about elevators and stuff.

But it's a fair tradeoff.

Finally I learned that were always going to make mistakes with our friends. Sometimes they are going to be really really really big mistakes and we just have to wait it out. Because you can't make anyone forgive you. Sometimes you really mess up and your going to have to wait for that person to comes to terms with it.

I didn't think that the first nine days of school would be this hard/educational/amazing

In the meantime I'll watch Glee while pretending to be Rachel Berry and manufacturing a lovechild wardrobe of Emma Pillsbury and Kurt Hummel. TV addictions are a sad thing never fall into them.