Monday, July 13, 2009

Today I learned about language. It's amazing how the vibrations of our vocal cords contain so much. But what is a voice without an ear?

So many times we all seem to forget to listen. Not just hear but listen. Sometimes it's harder to listen then it is to talk. It's finding that balance that is so tough. As I mentioned in my first ever post being a teenager is almost impossible at times. Humans by our very nature are self centered,not just teenagers and striking the balance between talking and listening is what keeps our sanity and friendships.

In my first post I also talked alot about how rapidly growing up changes. What amazes me is that with every option we have to talk to people we feel like our voices are'nt heard. I am not saying that this is the only generation that has felt silenced for every generation has. Maybe it's because with every chance we are given to show ourselves to the world we are given one more place to spread a persona.

Maybe none of these million outlets ask for a real person.

Status updates should be proclaimations of our amazing lives or Jerry Seinfeld esque witty observations. Perhaps the reason that we have'nt seen a rush to the comedy clubs that was seen is in the 80's is because every wannabe comedian has simply taken to their twitter account.

Maybe this is a blessing. Two painful hours in a comedy club reduced to 140 characters. But if we don't take advantage of these oppertuinties to make our voices heard then what vare we going to miss out on?

Once again it all comes down to a balancing act of talking and listening and being confident in being heard. Because once you learn balance it's as easy as breathing the hardest part is to move on.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Dreaming of the time when you are free from all the trouble you're in

Sorry for not updating in what feels like so long! So I combined one draft and one new lesson into a borderline sermon on discovery in the summertime.

Today I learned about "accomplishments" and how often we forget what they really are.

Summer "time" kicked in and I was shocked to find out that today was a Wednesday. That kind of scares me I don't want summer to slip by ala Arthur's "The Short Quick Summer"

But despite my qualms I am learning the joys of laziness. I've found a way to kill my internal clock and now can easily wake up at 10:00. This is important. So much of the time it feels like we are all under the gun. I'm all for one living life to the fullest like every day was my last etc etc.

I'm figuring out that summer doesn't have to be defined by how many people I hang out with or parties or events or anything like that. I can be a total recluse for days and then just go play tennis at the local courts and buy Dora the explorer Popsicles. That writing summer to do lists can be motivating and fun but often all a day needs is a new playlist,a good library book and shade in your favorite hammock. And that wraps up early summer lesson one.

Today I learned about friendships...and irony.

Today taught me that sometimes even when we are so convinced that were going to have one friend forever. Perhaps even remarking on this the morning before you see the other person,but maybe while sitting by the lake you realize.

"I'm outgrowing you"

And you don't want this,nobody wants it. But I think you really truly actually grow up the day you say "I don't care about growing up". I've never been one to judge and whatever illegal activities my teenage friends will involve themselves in I'm okay with that. But it's this absolute race to finish line of adulthood that scares me.

My friends call me a 40 year old. I like "strange music" Which by the way check out check Ohbijou and Regina Spektor they both have newish albums out and they are amazing!

But I think my most defining 40 year old quality is the fact that I am content where I am. I'm not searching for anything better I just want to try and learn as much as I can prepare yet live in the moment and live a great life full of contradictions and confusion and new experiences.

So I grow up, I grow down but in the end we all outgrow. The nice thing about the past though is that we never have to kill the memories. I will laugh at my grade 7 "I'm so dark and twisted lets wear lots of eyeliner and take it off before I go home"stage. I'll cry at the sad memories we shared I'll laugh at our moments of silliness. But in the end things aren't the same. I'm not the same and she is. We'll move on in our lives and we can thank each other for helping each other make it this far.

Summer makes me reflective it makes me melancholy at times but I am always learning.