Monday, March 14, 2011


There are few feelings worse than seeing the man behind the curtain. Whether it's the person in your head meeting the actual person or seeing how tiny the "cliff" you scaled in second grade actually is. It's this feeling of loss and the idea that you can't go back after this, everything is different now and it always will be. The closest you can ever get to that moment is to freeze right here right now at the second you became disillusioned and well nobody wants to stay there. not really. 
So I suppose we must choose to move forward. We delete that song and maybe we get a haircut. We smile and refuse to let whispers and glares hurt us because they could only hurt the "us" that was not what we have become since that night. Still though with all this moving forward we have to find a few things from the past to bring with us.
I reread the first harry potter book this morning, and you know what? It was as transformational and sweet and funny as it ever was. We don't have to lose everything. In the end we will forget people places and events because we want to, because deep down we know that we don't need them. 
We keep the people, songs and books close because we know that they are and will always be enough.
Love is always better than longing. Love what you have because it is brilliant and you'll see that when you stop hoping for silly impossible things. The rest with a bit of luck will come to you. 

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